Time swallows hatred, I am not a firm man

After Lu Gaosheng's death, the ones who knew his true identity were Li Xing, Kill Wolf, Blood Wolf, and Wu Qixue. Following the incident with the grain delivery, Li Xing secretly cultivated an intelligence organization and the forces of Bai Lu Army under Lu Gaosheng's guidance, all of which went to the northern region to follow Wu Qixue.

As for the fifth person, Bai Fang, Zhang San dared not say that he had ever harbored the slightest intention of killing her.

There was a fleeting moment when such thoughts did cross his mind.

But first, there were the teachings of his master from childhood.

Not to kill women, not to kill children.

Of course, the premise here was that neither of them had come to kill Zhang San. If faced with a life-or-death situation, Zhang San would not hesitate to violate the rules.

And it was evident that Bai Fang had no intention of killing him.

Secondly, Bai Fang was already a dying person.

Killing someone who was on the verge of death seemed entirely unnecessary.

On Bai Fang's side, she was initially very wary of Zhang San.

It wasn't until Zhang San showed her the letter from Lu Qingming that her attitude towards him underwent a significant change.

It even made Zhang San curious about what Lu Qingming had written in the letter.

In short, due to these various reasons, Zhang San's previous and current meetings with Bai Fang were harmonious. They even appeared like two old friends who had known each other for a long time.

During their last encounter, they entrusted each other with a favor.

The only difference was that, in Bai Fang's eyes, it was a personal favor, while in Zhang San's eyes, it was a transaction.

Zhang San received a wooden box and picked up one of the letters inside. When he opened it, the first line read: "Xiao Er, how are you? How is your martial arts training going? Your mother has received another letter from your father..."

The letters in the wooden box were all written in the name of Wang Xiaoer's mother.

However, the author was Bai Fang.

In the past six months, Wang Xiaoer and his master had been wandering around, so he hadn't received any letters from his mother. But the truth was, even if nothing had happened, Zhang San would soon run out of letters to give to Wang Xiaoer.

He had exhausted his mother's letters.

Zhang San had also considered whether he should forge a few letters himself. With his skills, forgery was easy, but figuring out how to write convincingly was challenging.

Especially when it came to a letter from a mother to her son. Zhang San tried to write in the same tone as Wang Xiaoer's mother, but none of them turned out satisfactory.

Deceiving ordinary children might be possible, but Wang Xiaoer was exceptionally clever. Although he could be quite "simple" at times, he was genuinely intelligent when it counted.

That's why Zhang San thought of Bai Fang.

Bai Fang chose to entrust her daughter to Ming Qing, while Wang Xiaoer's mother chose to entrust Wang Xiaoer to Zhang San.

Both were mothers, both were gravely ill, and both deeply loved their children.

Zhang San believed that if he showed Bai Fang all the letters his mother had written in the past two years and asked her to write in the same tone, it might pass off as genuine.

After reading the letter in his hand, Zhang San said to Bai Fang, "It should work. It's better than what I wrote, and most likely enough to deceive that kid."

"But what about the handwriting..." Bai Fang hesitated slightly.

Zhang San replied directly, "I will copy the letter again, I'll take care of the handwriting, it's not difficult."

Bai Fang nodded and took out another stack of letters from behind, handing them to Zhang San. "These are the letters written by Wang Xiaoer's mother. I understand her concerns. The top two letters here are the ones Wang Xiaoer wrote to his mother. I have read them all before writing my letter, and now I'm returning them to you."

Zhang San received the letters and said, "I know you're seriously ill, yet you still went through the trouble. But Wang Xiaoer is too clever. In these two letters he wrote to his mother a year ago, he shared some of his recent experiences that she didn't know about. If you had written your letter without incorporating some of the content from his letters, it would certainly have been suspicious."

Bai Fang looked deeply at Zhang San, feeling that this man before her had an astute mind. She couldn't help but say, "You have thought about it very carefully and thoroughly. However..."

"Each day we manage to keep it hidden is a day gained," Zhang San calmly replied.

Bai Fang said, "Children will always grow up."

Zhang San said, "But I truly have no other choice."

Bai Fang looked at him in bewilderment.

Zhang San shrugged helplessly and said, "Killing, martial arts, and such things... I feel like a natural genius at them. I didn't need much practice to excel at them. I've even written a book, a book filled with the art of killing. But... how do you comfort a child? I don't know, and I have no place to learn."

Bai Fang fell silent for a moment and asked, "Who exactly is Wang Xiaoer seeking revenge against?"

"It's not a matter of revenge," Zhang San immediately shook his head and continued, "I have a friend, someone familiar yet also a stranger. We met about a year ago after being apart for twenty years... and I discovered that we had become completely different individuals."

The image of that figure in white clothes surged into his mind.

Bai Fang leaned against the wall, sitting on the bed inside the room, while Zhang San sat on a chair beside the bed.

The summer breeze was cool, but Zhang San lowered his head slightly, filled with memories and doubts, and said, "He wants revenge. He really, really wants it. When I noticed this, it felt strange to me... Why does he want revenge so badly, while I, except for the first few years of apprenticeship, never had such thoughts?"

"Later, I thought about it carefully and realized that perhaps the real reason is time, or maybe it's the life we've lived over these years. Twenty years is truly a long time."

"In these twenty years, I followed my master, traveling far and wide, sometimes sleeping on the streets, and other times enjoying a good meal at a restaurant. I've killed many people—evil ones, and even... good ones! There was a very kind old man, but in reality, the people I killed the most were those I didn't even know whether they were good or bad."

Gradually, as I grew accustomed to following my master, the desire for revenge grew fainter.

Time swallowed my hatred.

I bowed my head to life.

Perhaps I should apologize to the people who died so tragically and to my parents, because I am not someone who clings steadfastly to the memory of revenge.

Was I wrong not to seek revenge?

I don't know.

But during the days spent with my master, while he was still alive, I gradually forgot about the hatred... and it truly made me happy.

With each memory that surfaced.

Zhang San continued, "My friend sought revenge, but in the end, he failed and died. The night he died seemed to awaken my own hatred. The opponent... was a formidable person with a powerful background. Killing him would surely invite trouble. However, I still made an irrational choice. But when I avenged my enemy..."

There wasn't much joy.

There wasn't much happiness.

That day, when I killed Lin Nu with a single strike, I stood in front of the county yamen for a while. The sword of forgetting vengeance was by my side, and the enemy's head was at my feet. Yet, I couldn't feel any joy or a great sense of relief. At most, I whispered in my heart, "Rest in peace, Xiu Wangchou."

That was all, nothing more.

After listening to so much, Bai Fang felt a bit puzzled.

She asked, "Why did you tell me so much?"

She faintly sensed that the man before her wasn't the type to easily reveal his true feelings.

Zhang San shrugged and said, "I don't know. I just kept talking, maybe because you did me a great favor, and most importantly... you're about to die."

It didn't matter what he said to the dead; they were the most tight-lipped people in this world.

Bai Fang didn't mind the truth in Zhang San's words, and she felt relieved.

She nodded and said, "It seems that you don't want Wang Xiaoer to seek revenge."

Zhang San immediately shook his head and said solemnly, "Of course not! The idea of tit for tat is nonsense. I can't even bring myself to say it. I just think that he's only ten years old after all. Although he's mature for his age, it would be a good thing if I can keep it hidden from him until he grows up and learns my skills."

When he grows up, everything will be up to him.

Whether he wants to be Zhang San or Xiu Wangchou, it will be his decision.

But before that, it wouldn't be a bad thing to live without carrying so much hatred.

Bai Fang silently nodded, fully understanding Zhang San's intentions. In the end, she had never told Bai Xiaoyu anything about Bai ShiXuan and Song YanShi.

In a sense, Zhang San was doing what she had done.

Bai Fang looked at Zhang San, and it seemed that her gaze had changed somewhat. She said, "In that case, I can entrust you with peace of mind."

Hmm...

Zhang San's brows furrowed as he snapped out of his reminiscence.

Why did he feel a change in the atmosphere?

What was with this eerie sense of entrusting life and death in an otherwise straightforward transaction?

Zhang San quickly waved his hand and said, "I only promised you that if Bai Xiaoyu is ever in danger, I will help her once, and the price is that you help me write a letter. This is a transaction. You've already given me your 'money,' and my 'goods' will be ready."

Upon hearing this, Bai Fang burst into laughter, her flawless face becoming even more enchanting.

"He was right in his letter. You truly are an interesting person."

Zhang San knew which letter Bai Fang was referring to but couldn't help asking, "Did he mention me?"

Bai Fang replied, "Yes, he... is very grateful to you."

Zhang San fell silent for a moment and thought, "Then why don't you ask him to settle the three thousand taels of silver? He's been giving money and land to everyone in Tian Ruo Prefecture, but he conveniently forgot about me?"

This is just taking advantage of an honest person!

A surge of resentment welled up in Zhang San's heart.

But after all, this is not a complaint. Apart from Wang Xiaoer's letter, there is another extremely important matter.

Zhang San immediately took out a white jade finger ring with cloud patterns carved on it from his sleeve.

Bai Fang, upon seeing it, stood frozen in place.

Witnessing this scene, Zhang San was already certain that Bai Fang should have some familiarity with this finger ring. He said, "This was given to me by Lu Gaosheng, who said it was your father's keepsake..."

A long pause ensued.

Bai Fang blinked her eyes, then lowered her head to wipe away the slight dampness, so that her teary eyes wouldn't appear too fragile.

"Can... can I have a look?" Bai Fang asked.

Zhang San handed her the finger ring.